One year as an Avicus staff member! by PublixEmployee January 19, 2015 at 6:01 PM UTC
I've neglected making one of these threads for as I knew that my one year as a staff member was coming soon, and I found that more important and made me more proud.Throughout my time on Avicus I have learned more about myself then ever. As some people may know, I do have social anxiety which is why I spend most of my time online.I've always had life problems, and Avicus is brought me through them. The following things I am about to say is only known by a few users, most of which are staff members.You see, when I first got Jr Mod I was a happy human being. I was nice to everyone and I loved to make people laugh and have a good time. But about 3 weeks in to being a staff member, I hit rock bottom.My depression started... My dad lost his job due to cancer. He was diagnosed with two types of cancer at once. We didn't have the money to pay it, and our insurance just wasn't enough. They say my dad didn't have that much of a chance of making it... I started to dwell on it, I couldn't forget it. My dad was my hero at that time, I did everything with him.About a month later, my best friend killed himself. After that happened, my other best friend killed himself. I lost two of my best friends in under 1 month. I became a wreck.I didn't tell much people about it, but my life changed a lot. I became somewhat rude at times and swore a lot. I didn't talk much either, I was a robot in-game.So that went on for about 4 months, then I learned some new things happened. One of my friends got shot, the other was arrested for selling drugs. I wasn't sure what to do after that.Once I heard about that, I became very angry easily. I would snap from the easiest things ever. It majorly affected how I did my job on Avicus.When I became a Sr Mod, I was recovering, but I was still an angry person and would snap easily. I wasn't sure what I should do with my life.While recovering, I became more depressed from my school life. I wasn't ever really bullied, I wasn't ever really accepted, I was just ignored always.I got so depressed that I tried to kill myself. Not once, but multiple times. Each time I backed out because on the inside I knew I didn't want to die or I failed at it.However, I hit another turning point later. I met some new great friends and my dad managed to make it through cancer. I instantly became a happier person as a whole.
At this moment in time, I am recovering again from my depression, and I have become a better person as a whole. From Avicus I learned my morals that I would keep for my whole life. The main one is one that most people actually ignore and call dumb.It's one you are taught in preschool. "Treat people the way you want to be treated." I've learned to treat people the way I want to be treated, from accepting all to ingoring no one.I've learned more about how I need to stop thinking my life is terrible, because there is always someone in a worse stage of life.I have mainly been touched my younger kids with cancer. I've been growing out my hair for two months now, and in Mid Feb I will be shaving my head for kids with cancer to prove to others that it is just hair and that most of these kids may never get their hair back at all due to chemo.I'm currently donating some clothes to go to homeless people that are stuck in the cold during winter and don't have winter clothing. And regardless of what they have done to become homeless, you don't fully know what happened so I wouldn't judge, they are humans too and should be treated as if they are just like us.I've learned accepting is the key and it will always come back around to do you good.Now regarding all people that think I "hate" them, I'm sorry. I know I was rude in the past, and I am sorry for that. If you think I "hate" you, just know I don't. I don't hate anyone on Avicus.
At this point of it I would add a part of the thread where I thank certain users, but I am not going to do that. My thank you doesn't do to certain people, it goes to all of Avicus, regardless if you are a staff member or not. Just remember this, I like each user on Avicus and don't forget that. It's been one hell of a ride, and I am looking foward for my future on Avicus.
Zedther January 19, 2015 at 6:01 PM UTC
This is a really touching story...It's great to see you're a fantastic person, keep your head up and do your best
we all appreciate you <3
Robin_DD_J January 19, 2015 at 6:01 PM UTC
You seem to be a fantactic person!ViceTechnicolour January 19, 2015 at 6:01 PM UTC
You guys really need to read the text, it's more than a "Gratz Man"...I can't imagine how you feel, Poppy, but I do want you to know that you're an amazing person and that the ability you've had to go through all this and be so kind, it's a large sum of respect I have for you. Thank you for your service, and congratulations on one year, and congratulations for being so amazing as a human.
MLGtino January 19, 2015 at 6:01 PM UTC
<3lactify January 19, 2015 at 6:01 PM UTC
So sad to hear all of this trauma. No matter what Docta, we will be her for you.But congrats on 1 year on being a staff member. What an achievement!
smitdalt January 19, 2015 at 6:01 PM UTC
Congratz bubbyseriously though, you're a super sick dude and one of the main reasons I stuck around the avicus community for so long. The first time I came into teamspeak you were really nice to me and I really appreciated that. <33
RefuseToSink January 19, 2015 at 6:01 PM UTC
It takes a lot of courage to share something like that with us. I'm proud of you for sticking with Avicus, even with all of that going on behind the scenes. I have a lot of respect for you, you're a great friend, and I'll always be here for you. Congratulations Tyler on one year as staff, and here's to many more :)AutoHit January 19, 2015 at 6:01 PM UTC
It's sad to hear about what happened before, but I'm glad you stuck with Avicus and managed to get through it. You are a amazing and kind person, and I have respect you for that. Congratulations on one year as staff, and thanks for your service.D00ZiE January 19, 2015 at 6:01 PM UTC
<3Myv January 19, 2015 at 6:01 PM UTC
You legend.Sem January 19, 2015 at 6:01 PM UTC
Respect <333PublixEmployee January 19, 2015 at 7:01 PM UTC
Thanks for all the nice comments guys, I was scared to make this thread because I wasn't sure how people would react. :Dhasl January 19, 2015 at 7:01 PM UTC
Thanks for all the nice comments guys, I was scared to make this thread because I wasn't sure how people would react. :D
Thank you Doc, and all the best for your future life ahead of you!
Glitchaye January 19, 2015 at 7:01 PM UTC
<3 m7Stimulating January 19, 2015 at 7:01 PM UTC
Keep on man, I've been through as hit before, not that bad, but I definately respect that. Depression is a steep hill, as I've learned from others. Keep your head up and know we're all there for you, through thick and thin, all the friends you made here will last a while. It takes a lot to come out and say that. Much respect.ParthDarthVader January 19, 2015 at 7:01 PM UTC
Hey, its all right....We're all glad you didn't commit suicide. You may have been in depression, but think of all the players who would have also fallen into depression because of it....
Honestly, you're a great Sr. Moderator and you should stick to whoever you are. It's common for someone to fall into depression for these reasons...and you shouldn't be ashamed. We all will have those moments where we just can't take things in our life. And that's where you have to smile. Be the person you want to be. And it was very brave of you to tell us all that.
Stay cool,
FrankenRavi
Mooch24 January 19, 2015 at 8:01 PM UTC
/<3/Porkyyy January 19, 2015 at 8:01 PM UTC
We appreciate all of your work on the Avicus Network. Great to have you with us!ImRaging January 19, 2015 at 8:01 PM UTC
Wow. You've gone through a lot. To have someone go through cancer, I sort of know what it feels like. However, I was young at the time and don't remember much of the family member that died from it. And to have two friends commit suicide...man that's tough. Well I think 'congrats for 1 year a Staff Member' is a little bit of an understatement. I think 'congrats for being able to get through life so far, even at it's toughest moments'. Yeah that should do it.-Ragingtel6331 January 19, 2015 at 8:01 PM UTC
You know I got yo back homie G!!!!! You better be getting that quote on your wall otherwise I will take away your pizza!!!!! <33chaibrit1 January 19, 2015 at 9:01 PM UTC
Tyler, there's no way I can describe you (without taking up 500 lines) besides being an amazing person. You've gone through so much and are still here to make us laugh, smile, and make the server better in general. Avicus wouldn't be the same without you, <3.Jahaj January 19, 2015 at 9:01 PM UTC
There are not enough words in the english language to describe how sorry I am for your losses. But you are rebounding, and that is the important part. If that were me, I might still be in depression, or even dead. Keep up the good work as a mod, and hopefully there will be a 2 year celebration, too!Lavish January 19, 2015 at 11:01 PM UTC
Truly touched. Glad to have you as one of my closest friends on Avicus. Ill always be here for you bro.GrapeSmoothie January 19, 2015 at 11:01 PM UTC
Pop your an amazing person, words can't describe how glad I am to see your still here. Sorry for your losses and Thanks for all you've done for Avicus. It wouldn't be the same if you weren't aroundMajestysDream January 19, 2015 at 11:01 PM UTC
I am still shocked by this, Pop. You're truly an amazing person. I am very sorry for your losses, and I hope you recover soon. Thank you for staying on Avicus, it wouldn't be the same at all without you. Thank you for everything you've done so far for Avicus. Congratulations on 1 year. :)Atheyna January 19, 2015 at 11:01 PM UTC
Im really sorry for all your loses Docta, but I have to say that you are an outstanding individual on The Avicus Network. Thanks for all you do for us! <3Strmr January 20, 2015 at 12:01 AM UTC
Congratulations! more years to come!Joao_Victor January 20, 2015 at 12:01 AM UTC
Damn.Gratz on staying strong through all those tough times, good luck on your future <3
PublixEmployee January 20, 2015 at 12:01 AM UTC
Damn.
Gratz on staying strong through all those tough times, good luck on your future <3
Mooch24 January 20, 2015 at 1:01 AM UTC
PublixEmployee January 20, 2015 at 1:01 AM UTC
FrostedCupcakez January 20, 2015 at 1:01 AM UTC
Aweh Tyler, you've been an amazing friend. And if you ever need anything I'll try my best to help you, I'm glad with Avicus because if you didn't I don't know who else would be my amazing rock music buddy :') Stay strong :DEmmaye January 20, 2015 at 2:01 AM UTC
I'm glad you've stayed with us, sorry to hear about your friends though...Awarrior January 20, 2015 at 3:01 AM UTC
The only thing I have to say about this,"Whip it baby, whip it all night"
OPTOBAT January 20, 2015 at 3:01 AM UTC
Amazing speech, man I'm really proud of you and you have my full respect :)Congratulations, hope to see you round :)
- OPTOBAT (Fred)
PublixEmployee January 20, 2015 at 6:01 AM UTC
Thanks for all the support guys! :DMangoSmoothie_ January 20, 2015 at 6:01 AM UTC
Wow, you are amazing! Thanks for sticking to being a staff on the Avicus Network through the tough times, I'm sure all of Avicus appreciate it.Splades January 20, 2015 at 7:01 AM UTC
It was nice of you to take time and type this out. Gratz on 1 year of being a staff member and I hope you can carry yourself to Admin☻Iron January 20, 2015 at 1:01 PM UTC
I hope the bombs reached your home <3 DHL is really slow sometimes..Thanks for being such a great person pop! All you gotta do now is become an admin and your list of achievements will extend even farther! :D
RightSide January 20, 2015 at 4:01 PM UTC
WOW :DTrexychan January 20, 2015 at 5:01 PM UTC
thanks for your service docta-for teh glory of avicus
StewieFG January 20, 2015 at 8:01 PM UTC
This story made me cry as my granda died from cancer too. I completely understand you and thanks so much for your service to Avicus. <3RCMP_Mountie January 21, 2015 at 3:01 AM UTC
Strength prevails, we'll always be here for you Pop. Gratz on one year, thanks for staying with us and for all you've contributed to Avicus. You are truly amazing. <3pew pew xd
JJTheGuy January 21, 2015 at 5:01 AM UTC
I... Well, I can't say I know how you feel about the cancer part, but depression and friends killing themselves... Aye, I understand. Thank you for sharing your story, it helps. Major respect dude.AstroPizza January 21, 2015 at 7:01 AM UTC
That really is an amazing story , i've been through tough times in my life but nothing to what you have been through.I highly respect you for making this post ; glad to have you on the staff team!Xx_Maddy_xX January 21, 2015 at 8:01 AM UTC
This made me cry. I've been through some pretty tough times myself but nothing compared to this. I'm very sorry for your losses. You are an amazing person. Keep your head held high! (: Congratulations on one year as staff! <3badgg January 21, 2015 at 12:01 PM UTC
Damn, I think I split my rocks on this one...!Nah congratulations on one year, you've been a dedicated staff member!
Sevoo January 21, 2015 at 1:01 PM UTC
Suicide is a permanent solition to a temporary problem.Pop, if you ever get suicidal thoughts again, you NEED to get help, does NOT matter who it is, and I honestly think your dad would be ideal :3.
But grats on 1 year bro! I wouldnt even last a week lol
BerrySmooothie January 23, 2015 at 11:01 AM UTC
this is amazing <3Tarheelkiwi January 23, 2015 at 1:01 PM UTC
Really touching story Pop. Stay in there and remember, suicide isn't the answer <3Zeusy February 11, 2015 at 10:02 AM UTC
Life's one hell of a ride, it takes everyone strength, courage and inspiration to make it through. The D shall always be freezing cold! (;Howsie February 11, 2015 at 10:02 AM UTC
Life's one hell of a ride, it takes everyone strength, courage and inspiration to make it through. The D shall always be freezing cold! (;
